Saturday, 31 January 2015

Too little too late

I think I was very clear about wanting snow so I could work from home...  So of course it waited till Saturday when I actually had no work and my own plans to be out and about...  Also it's wet and sleety not soft and fluffy. So not much happening today. Except getting my hair cut the now. Wish me luck!

Friday, 30 January 2015

Crap day apart from the walking

The snow - such as it was - was gone by the time I clawed my way out of bed this morning so I had no excuse to work from home. And morale at the office was so low this morning I really really wished I had. I wasn't directly affected myself, but you wouldn't believe (unless you work in an office) how much time was spent this morning on rehashing certain events that took place yesterday. Because nothing fixes a struggling project like pi$$ing off all the staff and uniting them in resentment...
Ah well, today was not a brilliant day.  The morning was, as above, full of hostility and anger. In the afternoon I was told my contract was probably not going to be extended. Which is not a calamity given I have a possible lead already on another job, but still isn't lots of fun. And I was starving. So I had a Bounty.
After work I blew off some steam with a second (dry)walk and I admit it, a bit of booze. Now, one beer later, I'm feeling more relaxed. And at least it's the weekend... Here's some more photos from my lunchtime walk as the evening one wasn't very picturesque...

Food today:
Breakfast: eggs scrambled with veg and some homemade gf bread
Lunch: soup
Dinner: bolognese sauce on cabbagetti
Snacks: Chicken liver pate with chopped veg; yogurt.

Took a lunchtime walk...

The weather turned on me! Lovely sunshine when I left, and in under an hour icy rain, clouds and a bitter wind.
But still no snow.

The canal towpath was sloppy and slippery underfoot - with plenty of massive puddles to dodge - and my back decided to ache all the way. Still glad I went through - fresh air (and it was really fresh!), a bit of exercise and a break from my desk that I badly needed.

Thursday, 29 January 2015

as I said... Today was a better day

My little diet meltdown yesterday has me considering my options regarding the antidepressants I'm taking. I was already considering weaning myself off them following our house move (I thought it would be a bad idea to do it before then given my well established stressed /depressed reaction to moving house) as I don't want to spend years on them again. But if I can feel so low while taking them - and be driven to binge as self-medication while taking them - maybe I should bring that forward so I'm not taking ineffective chemicals with side effects any longer than necessary. I can buy a lot of chocolate and cake for the price of a prescription after all. I'm not going to leap into a knee jerk reaction, I don't know if I would have been suicidal rather than bingeicidal without the pills, and obviously I will have to come off them gradually rather than cold turkey if that's my decision, but I'm kind of in favour at the moment.
I was right about today being better! I didn't even eat all the food I'd taken to work, and only snacked on fruit. I didn't get a proper walk because I had to go to the post office, which didn't bother me that much given how cold it was.
And on the subject of cold, I requested enough snow to provide an excuse to work from home...  I got a piddling little sleet shower as I drove home, and arrived to approximately 2 mm of snow on the back lawn. Pathetic...

Food today:
Breakfast: hard boiled egg salad made with homemade garlic mayo; fruit
Lunch: prawn mayo salad with salad veg
Dinner: chicken stuffed with philadelphia and sun dried tomatoes and sweet potato fries. Oh, and sauerkraut.
Snacks: fruit

Today WILL be better...

I have to admit something, in a little whisper so that any roaming diet police can't hear me...
Yesterday having a binge DID help. I felt happier while eating all that crap and calmer afterwards and today I don't feel as miserable as I did. I know the usual statement after a binge is one of regret, shame, guilt and so forth, all of which I have often posted about, but this time...  It made me feel better, and now I feel like it's out of my system, which is why today will be better.

Wednesday, 28 January 2015

Sugar. (literally)

I crumpled like a paper bag.
The mind and body were both weak.
Damn damn damn DAMN
Please excuse my language - but I'm upset. Frustrated. Annoyed. And all round not happy.
Dreadful weather prevented any real walk at lunchtime. (although didn't stop me popping to the nearest shop to buy binge fodder) A request to let someone view the current rental house tomorrow means housework will prevent an after work walk. And housework... Well, there's no better reason I can think of for a bad mood. Especially following a rubbish day at work and a binge.

Oh well. Thanks Deniz & Roxie for your support!

I want to binge

Really really a lot

Tuesday, 27 January 2015

Bring on the snow

Dreary weather did not stop me walking today, and yes, of course, I feel better for it. I didn't want to shop so I just explored somewhere I hadn't been before. It was fairly pleasant although also quite bleak, as you can see.

But just going somewhere a bit different was nice for a change. (you'd never guess the M4 is just the other side of those trees, would you?)
I'm feeling a bit less blah today so I think it was mostly TTOM yesterday. Not that that's over - I'm still retaining water and feeling gross, but the more general weeping for the world's woes is returning to a slightly more normal level - sympathy rather than despair sums it up I think.
I'm still sick of the rubbish weather though, and torn between not wanting snow because it's a pain and wanting snow so I can plead working from home on safety grounds... Yes, OK, mostly I want it to snow :-)
I'm still continuing with the desultory packing of stuff we won't need before the move.  Some boxes, but mostly black bin bags so far. And speaking of, does anyone know a foolproof way to open black bin bags, because the first few on the roll came open quite easily but I swear the last two weren't bags, just single sheets of plastic even though that can't be true. I ended up chucking them at the wall, which surprisingly also failed to open them.

Food today:
Breakfast: scrambled eggs with vegetables
Lunch: curried Cauliflower soup
Dinner: big salad with Paleo Carnitas
Snacks: yogurt, homemade pork rinds, fruit

Monday, 26 January 2015

Stomach cramps and gummy bears

Well, my weekend was a bit mixed. I did a reasonable amount of walking on Saturday, less yesterday, I ate OK on Saturday, not so well yesterday, drank a bit - more than I intended - Saturday, less yesterday...  I hardly slept Saturday night and had stomach cramps all morning yesterday, which is responsible for quite a bit of the above. And the gummy bears.  However I also had a productive day yesterday in particular with a trip to the recycling centre to get rid of quite a bit of rubbish, some household chores including scouring the door seal of a washing machine (woo hoo - partay!!!) , and a bit of light packing for the move - getting started at a gentle pace to reduce the panic when we get to doing it for real. Plus I started to watch The Expendables 3 and (according to M) gave up on it just as it got good. I don't seem to have the attention span to watch movies at the moment, unless they catch me really early.
This morning I passionately wanted to pull the covers over my head and refuse to get out of bed when my alarm went off. It must be because of the dark mornings, but I'm seriously struggling with the whole getting out of bed thing these days as never before. I made it only after wrestling with myself for 2 minutes but still kind of wish I hadn't bothered, despite the morning actually passing quite quickly - every time I looked at the clock an hour or more had passed whereas usually it seems as though the clock is going backwards.
I tried going out for a lunchtime walk today (staying on paths because we've had rain) but cut it short due to a nasty cold wind. It felt quite unsatisfying but when I got back and checked my pedometer it was better than I had thought - about a mile and a half instead of the usual 2 miles. If I'd managed to get myself out again after work I could have made up the difference...  But nah.
I have to say I've been feeling quite down lately - probably just due to stressing out a bit over the upcoming house move, but as a result things like sad or horrible news stories, sad blogs, even sad fiction and unpleasant weather are upsetting me at the moment. Could be a bit of TTOM as well I guess. TTOM and SAD or maybe I'm just a self-centred depressive.

Oh well.  Food today good. Work not terrible. Exercise lacking. No nytol because I'm worried about Alzheimers. Let's see how I sleep tonight...

Food today:
Breakfast: boiled eggs with gf soldiers
Lunch: hot and sour soup
Dinner: big salad with roast gammon

Snacks: homemade pork rinds, toasted coconut

Friday, 23 January 2015

What a lovely day...

Hopefully I finally figured out how to add photos when posting on my phone and you can see what a lovely walk I had at lunchtime. (please someone tell me if it didn't work) I didn't have any shopping to do and didn't feel like walking the canal bank twice in a week so instead I went to a little nature reserve less than a mile from the office, where I walked once around the lake before returning to work. About 3 miles in 53 minutes - I was slowed down quite a lot by the slippery conditions underfoot, as there were patches of icy frozen mud in the more exposed areas and areas of slippery wet mud under the trees. There were moments when I thought I might end up taking a mud bath :-)  Probably not the best choice for a walk at this time of year but it was so peaceful and sunny it was well worth the risk. Apart from when a Chinook flew overhead (low) and made a hideous racket for a couple of minutes, completely drowning out the coots, ducks and other birds. I'm pretty sure it was warmer out by that lake than it was in the office this morning - but it seemed to get warm in the afternoon so hopefully that signals they fixed the heating, rather than the equally likely explanation that the office was being heated by lots of PCs - and a really lot of hot air... 
I walked again after work, doing a little shopping (man, Tesco is annoying on a Friday evening) and in total clocked up over 5 miles today - which makes me feel less guilty about not getting on the climber yet. I was a bit naughty this evening - I had a couple of beers - but Friday night kind of screams out for beer,  or booze anyway, don't you think? (and if you don't think, you don't work...) 

Food today :
Breakfast: bacon and eggs 
Lunch: chopped veg with homemade prawn dip followed by a small natural yogurt 
Dinner: Liver and Onions, mash & green beans 
Snacks: braeburn apple, Cashew butter 

Thursday, 22 January 2015

Motivated. Ish

My first day of weighing food today got things off to a good start, although I had to keep reminding myself. I'm pretty sure I'll be back to taking it for granted soon enough. But it's not very interesting so I won't go on about it.  I also weighed myself, which was horrible and depressing and almost made me swallow my own tongue. It also had some motivational quality though; we'd talked about eating out today (which would have included booze of course) but we decided to stay in and I cooked healthy stuff, for a meal that was cheaper, more diet friendly and didn't involve any alcohol. A victory for both of us!
I worked  from home today and as usual spent the whole day reaching new levels of sedentaryness - working mostly in bed. I wanted to do more and actually changed into training gear at lunchtime but as I went to get on the machine I felt a stabbing pain that convinced me not to. Instead I made some gf bread rolls with Tapioca flour and did some laundry before returning to work. After work however I actually managed to leave the house, unlike my usual total apathy. I didn't walk a vast distance but I did enjoy stretching my legs.
When I work from home I generally put something undemanding on the TV for company, and today was a complete blast from the past - I watched Grease!!  Talk about guilty pleasures... There's a possibility that somebody tone deaf with a voice like a dying crow even sang along with a few songs... I can neither confirm nor deny :-) But Summer Lovin' might burn off some calories even without dancing.  Maybe. I also tried to reclaim some credibility with Game of Thrones, which did not inspire singing of any kind.

Food today :
Breakfast: homemade butternut squash soup with an egg cooked in it
Lunch: homemade cream of (dried) mushroom soup; homemade gf roll with a tiny bit of cheese
Dinner: chicken salad - a couple of very small chicken thighs with Kale, romaine, and all the normal stuff. And homemade dressing.
Snacks: Greek yogurt, toasted coconut flakes, a little cashew butter.

Wednesday, 21 January 2015

Yes, a walk does always make things better

Well, it's been a grey and humid day today but a good 5 or 6 degrees warmer than yesterday and that,  combined with the silly portable heaters, meant that no coats or wooly hats were required in the office today - phew!  Also they've given in and decided to fix the heating so an engineer will be coming tomorrow. I was thisclose to working from home today (and still may tomorrow since the forecast overnight and early tomorrow is pretty cold and of course the heating will be completely off while it's fixed) but I was quite glad I didn't as I got in a lunch walk with conversation and that's worth driving in for! You know I love walking anyway but when it's a fairly tired route I've done a million times and there are time constraints preventing exploration having company makes the whole thing more enjoyable, apparently less effort (even though we walk just as fast) and therefore more refreshing.
OK, that's enough positivity for now, on to more sobering thoughts.
I've decided that although I fully intend to remain lower carb (ignore the slip up below) and follow the Perfect Health Diet I need to reintroduce an old diet habit that most proponents of both say is not necessary, but I think I need it -  namely the food scale. I used to be obsessive about weighing all my meals but got out of the habit months and months ago and I'm definitely feeling that portion creep has resulted. The other side of weighing food, of course, is recording it - so I'll also be dusting off my subscription to I know I do record what I eat on here, but if I say chicken salad you couldn't tell from this blog if it was 100g of lean chicken breast or a whole deep fried chicken in that salad - so I need to be a bit more specific somewhere. Starting tomorrow :-).  I keep making recipes up, especially for soups, without weighing any of the ingredients, which makes it hard to work out the calories of course.  Must. Stop. Doing. That. Bad Chrissie!  Bad! Hopefully getting back into that habit will help since I appear to be the only person who ever lived that is perfectly capable of eating vast quantities of fat & protein without genuinely feeling satiated (though possibly bored) - and don't even get me started on my appetite for carbs once I get going. Bloat no object. But I am soooooo sick of being the size I am (and feeling worse at present because every time I trawl through the cupboards looking for things to sell / dump / donate I find more clothes I loved wearing at my lowest weight but can't wear now...)
Oh yes.  I should probably take the terrifying step of reinstating the weigh ins as well.  Crap. Don't wanna!!!

Food today :
Breakfast: scrambled eggs with bacon and leftover veggies from last night's dinner
Lunch: homemade cream of (dried) mushroom soup; bag of crisps
Dinner: Pork tenderloin marinated in mustard - balsamic marinade with veggies
Snacks: Greek yogurt, toasted coconut flakes, cashews

Tuesday, 20 January 2015


The air con at work is broken AGAIN - and last night was, as far as I know, the coldest so far this year (in Berkshire - I know it's still not in the same ballpark as Scotland). My car told me it was - 2.5 on my drive this morning. I put my coat ON when I got into work. What's wrong with that picture???
As you can probably imagine there was far more talk about the temperature than about the work this morning, at least for the first few hours. The rumour is the company is trying to save money by waiting to repair /replace the system. They should consider how much they could save be letting everyone work from home, if you ask me. Which they don't. Of course I'm biased as I'd love to work from home at least 2 or 3 days a week.
Ah well. Rant over.
About lunchtime it warmed up enough to take off my coat and scarf, thanks to the facilities guys driving to the nearest supermarket and buying half a dozen little table top electric heaters to fit around the office. I didn't have the energy for a walk so I just read a book through lunch. I now kind of wish I had gone out, but just didn't feel it today. After work I was almost as lazy, spending my time in the kitchen instead of the climber /out walking. At least I was standing up rather than spending more time on my ass. And I got a batch of mayonnaise, a dijon mustard marinade and some mushroom soup out of it as well. And in the process used up odds and ends not worth dragging to the other house - a jar of mustard and half a bag of dried mushrooms to be precise. I know it doesn't sound like much, but every little helps and it  me as well. Which I needed after another crap night's sleep last night - nytol tonight I think.

Food today :
Breakfast: scrambled eggs with bacon and green pepper
Lunch: homemade cream of butternut squash soup; chopped veg with homemade prawn dip
Dinner: beef stew with veg
Snacks: homemade pork rinds, fruit and...  I confess..  A Bounty.

Monday, 19 January 2015

I should probably buy some more vitamin D

I was kind of down at the weekend - no special reason, just that generally out of sorts not really happy feeling that I hope I'm not the only person to feel, but it meant I felt even more antisocial than usual and spent a lot of it alone lying on the bed (I even had a nap on Saturday - probably the high point of the weekend) or in the kitchen. Some of the kitchen time was productive - quite a bit of cooking - some of it wasn't - quite a bit of picking, nibbling, grazing....
This morning I really wanted to have a lie in after sleeping quite badly but we had to do a bit of a house tidy because our letting agent was bringing someone around to look at the place while we're at work so I didn't have the time. Possibly not a bad thing, since I usually feel better if I take the plunge and just get up instead of lingering in bed.
It was at least a nice day - bloody cold of course, but bright sunshine all morning making me actually want to go out for a walk. As I am trying to cut out the 75000 extra quick trips to the shops I seem to make every week (in an attempt to cut back on food - and general grocery - spending), I didn't go to the supermarket as usual but instead headed away from town to the canal path to see how it was coping with the rain we had last week or thereabouts. It was really rather lovely, though walking to the supermarket with a colleague a few times has spoilt me and I slightly missed the company. The water was pretty high, and the sky was cloudless blue, with brilliant sunshine, but no real warmth so I was able to walk quite briskly - 3 miles in 50 minutes including pausing to take photos a few times and waiting to cross a few roads - without worrying about being sweaty when I got back to the office. Lovely!  The only downside was that the uneven slick footing made my back ache a little on the way out - but it was fine coming back so maybe it just needed to warm up.
After work I managed to relax and enjoy the evening just watching TV and doing a little cooking. My crap night's sleep last night has left me with not much energy so I think an early night is called for...

Food today :
Breakfast: scrambled eggs with bacon and green pepper
Lunch: homemade cream of butternut squash soup; cucumber slices with homemade prawn dip
Dinner: spicy turkey burger with a big salad
Snacks: toasted coconut flakes, pork scratchings

Friday, 16 January 2015

Hmm. Title. Don't have one

I was feeling OK again this morning - not quite as good a night last night but still a pretty good amount of sleep for a chronic insomniac. Then all hell broke loose in the office - problems with a high profile project that thankfully I'm not working on - and the atmosphere was horrendous, tension, rage, finger pointing and blame...  Even those of us who weren't directly involved couldn't help being affected by the mood of certain people, which had me passionately wishing I was wfh today just hearing about it through emails. Ah well. At least it's Friday.
At lunchtime I had a walk - and then again after work, about 5 miles in total - to get rid of some of that tension. I needed it, because we're spending more time these days planning for the house move and anyone who's read this over any length of time knows I HATE moving house and find it really stressful...
Yep.  Something else for me to complain about endlessly  :-)  Oh joy....

Food today :
Breakfast: scrambled eggs with bacon and mushrooms
Lunch: cheese sandwich. And yogurt with berries
Dinner: chicken karhai with mint (effectively an Indian chicken stir fry) with rice
Snacks: chopped veg with chicken liver pate, cashews

Thursday, 15 January 2015

What a great feeling

I'm told that last night the weather was horrendous - really windy.  I'm told. Because I wasn't lying awake listening to it I have no personal knowledge.  I was ASLEEP. Obviously the very limited sleep I had Tuesday night left me knackered last night; I turned the light off before 8 and was asleep in under 10 minutes I'd guess - and still slept right through till about 4am. I actually got up at 5am, and although I would have liked even more sleep I felt so much better for it! Admittedly I took no chances - relaxing bath, small amount of relaxing whisky (not enough to disrupt sleep patterns), smart alarm app playing soporific waves against the shore sounds and a Nytol - if I hadn't slept well it would have been incomprehensible.
Feeling so much better - positively bubbly in the morning despite being at work -  I walked to the supermarket at lunchtime with a colleague to buy some rooibos tea bags. So busy talking, I came back without the tea. That made this afternoon seem kind of long... I don't really like ordinary black tea but made do with it until I can get more tomorrow.
The wind is now rising again... Is it just me or does it seem to build up every evening like clockwork? The ocean waves will have to block it out again...

Food today :
Breakfast: 2 poached eggs on the gf bread I made yesterday.
Lunch: cheese sandwich - using the bread I made yesterday. Can you tell that these loaves of bread tend not to last very long? And a yogurt
Dinner: Paleo Carnitas with vegetables
Snacks: fruit, cashews

Wednesday, 14 January 2015

So tired....

I realised at last why my mood was so bad Monday & Tuesday - it was because I had to do an hours overtime at 10pm last night. The actual work went very smoothly, but I'm not a night person and I think the adrenaline of having to work makes it harder to get to sleep - so I've been knackered all day today, and very glad I have an agreement to work from home after an evening deployment.  However being so tired meant I wasted the opportunity to go out for walks. Yesterday I told myself I'd not out before starting work... nope...  At lunchtime....  nope...  And after work...  Yeah, well, nope again, in fact the furthest I went today was the end of the drive to put the bin out. I did bake a load of gf bread this afternoon - I'd mixed the dough last night while waiting to log back on - so there was a smidgeon of productivity.  Oh,  and I did do some housework - mostly attacking grout with a toothbrush and some mildew removing spray.  The bending made my back ache yet again and the high point of the day was a hot bath after I finished work. I'm now writing this in bed, listening to the wind outside and feeling about 900 years old. I hate winter (apart from the crisp dry frosty days)  and it isn't even February yet... However, even if I am 900 years old today, I still feel more human than yesterday and Monday!

Food today :
Breakfast: eggs scrambled with chicken and mushrooms
Lunch: beef soup
Dinner: masaman curry on cabbage noodles
Snacks: toast, yogurt with berries.  The toast was not my homemade gf bread, in fact it wasn't gf at all, and my stomach has been making the weirdest gurgling noises ever since......

Tuesday, 13 January 2015

Grump grump grumpy grump

You probably want to keep your distance from me today.
I'm grumpy.  Pouting.  Stomping. Silently, inwardly tantruming.

Don't know why.

Monday, 12 January 2015

Grrr aargh

I had a weird day today. Easier to get up this morning, but I had a major grump this morning. All morning, and it even led to me not bothering to walk at lunchtime. Despite the fact that the rain had paused for breath.  (it was torrential again when it was time to dash madly to my car after work) 
I felt a bit more cheerful around 2, then came over wobbly and lightheaded and had to resort to a bag of crisps to get my blood sugar up a bit. Not sure what that was about. Also my eye was throbbing away this morning and I had to take Ibuprofen to sort it out. I find it a little bit disheartening to think that maybe it's just going to be like that from now on. It didn't help that yesterday we tried to watch a 3D movie and had to switch to 2D after 20 minutes because I felt like someone was hammering a nail into my head just above the eyebrow. Aaarrggh. 
Sorry, I guess  I'm still somewhat in a grump. I think I'll blame it on January Mondayitis. And maybe gouge my eye out with a spoon. 

Food today :
Breakfast: eggs scrambled with smoked salmon, leek and mushrooms 
Lunch: spinach soup
Dinner: cheese salad 
Snacks: chopped veg dipped in  homemade chicken liver pate,  bag of crisps. 

Friday, 9 January 2015

Windy day & night

No, not talking about my digestive system... I spent some of last night listening to the wind outside the house and wanting to stay in, but got up to find rain as well as wind... Only a deep seated desire to keep getting paid got me out of the front door and into the car. Having said that, today I actually didn't feel like sleeping all afternoon, possibly because I walked a couple of miles at lunchtime, and didn't need to set up my under the desk caffeine IV straight into my arm :-)
Maybe I'm finally beginning to acclimatise to work again. Just in time for the weekend.
By mid-morning it was lovely and sunny (I guess there's one advantage to strong winds, they blow the rain clouds away) but it was clouding over again by the time I left for my walk and I was walking straight into the wind coming back to the office. Seems unfair to have to put that much effort into returning to the office, doesn't it? Definitely blew the cobwebs away though.

Food today :
Breakfast: eggs scrambled with bacon and mushrooms
Lunch: soup
Dinner: chicken fried rice
Snacks: cashews, chopped veg dipped in strained yogurt (not Greek yogurt but live natural organic ordinary yogurt because I wanted some whey for other recipes)

Thursday, 8 January 2015


Yesterday I worked from home and never left the house except to walk across the drive. Not easy to come up with anything to post from that. I was getting a quote from a removal firm and he came during my normal lunch break so that I didn't have time to go for a walk; by the end of the day I didn't have the inclination either. Also food was weird. Nothing close to binging but I did overeat and weirdly craved foods containing gluten - I've been craving buttered white toast for weeks now, and yesterday gave in. No ill consequences so far, though that doesn't incline me to repeat it. I enjoyed it at the time and now the craving is gone thankfully. 
Walking at lunchtime was limited today by my laziness plus some backache. I'm definitely blaming my office chair for most of the backache as yesterday, at home, it didn't start till mid-afternoon and today it started 30 minutes into the work day. I need to start strengthening it again rather than hoping it will magically feel better I think. After work I felt more inspired and did walk a bit but it was only a total of about 3, maybe 3.5 miles. 

Food today :
Breakfast: leftover burger & hard boiled egg 
Lunch: soup made by adding stock, water, herbs & extra veg to an unsuccessful Paleo shepherds pie base until it actually tasted nice 
Dinner: chicken, mushroom & spinach risotto 
Snacks: fruit; vegetables dipped in garlic mayo (sadly commercial because I was out of homemade mayo AND eggs to make more, also I was out of yogurt) - thanks Deniz for the suggestions the other day, I'll be following some of them after I shop at the weekend - and pork scratchings 

Tuesday, 6 January 2015

Sooo tired... Again

Thankfully it was a little easier to drag my lazy ass out of bed this morning - although I spent longer than usual in the shower - and I made it to work on one less cup of coffee than yesterday too. 
However I failed to bring a healthy snack and misjudged the size of breakfast so I was too hungry to be good. I must work that out... I don't want to keep pigging on nuts but can't think of a satisfying, interesting, low effort, fairly low carb and healthy alternative. But junk food is none of those things - except maybe low effort - so it needs doing. 
I was shattered again by this afternoon but hopefully in a day or two I'll reach a position where I can survive a full days work without yawning till my head splits in half and rolls across the floor... 
I'm writing this in bed but not yet asleep. Yes, I am 98.

Food today :
Breakfast: eggs scrambled with bacon and tomatoes 
Lunch: turkey and vegetable soup - now so thick it's more of a stew
Dinner: chilli with rice 
Snacks: crisps and M & M's 

Monday, 5 January 2015


Back to work already? Was there a holiday in there somewhere or not? It seems a dim and distant memory... 
I didn't want to get up today. I didn't want to go out in the cold morning air either. In fact today was all my normal Monday morning feelings on steroids with added grumpy on my part. Maybe I shouldn't take time off, it makes going back so much more horrible. 
Anyhow. It was sort of nice to see the people in the office again after such a quiet time over Christmas. I was really tired all morning - I knew it was a mistake getting up later while I wasn't working, but couldn't bring myself to get up at 4:45 am during my holiday. I don't suppose it will take long to get back to being a morning person though. At lunchtime I took some glassware and knick knacks to a charity shop and then carried on to do my lunchtime 2 miles with a little shopping. I hoped the fresh air and exercise would wake me up a bit...  Not so much. Maybe I should have snuck out to my car for a snooze instead... Mid-afternoon I had to resort to coffee (and my God is the coffee at work horrible after days of decent coffee at home) to make it through the afternoon slump. At least I stayed away from the vending machine and its piles of high carb,  no nutrition snacks... 
One day down, one day closer to Friday...

Food today :
Breakfast: leftover burger on gf Bread with tomato chutney 
Lunch: turkey and vegetable soup followed by Greek yogurt and melon chunks 
Dinner: chicken stir fry 
Snacks: cashews 

I need a nap

I've been back at work two hours 15 minutes.
It feels like days....

Saturday, 3 January 2015

A nice relaxing day

Yesterday was OK but I figured I'd probably written enough posts about going for a walk, eating, drinking & watching TV so I didn't feel inspired to post I'm afraid. 
Today I went to visit my Mum and her OH for the day.  We had planned a morning out in Salisbury but due to torrential rain showers all morning we just stayed indoors chatting and went to a local pub for lunch. But it was almost more relaxing than our plans would have been. My Mum's OH was suffering from pains in his neck & ear so driving was painful for him - it wasn't easy to check for obstacles before turning - so not driving all that way was probably better for him, and although I really enjoy going out and about with them it's not the point of the visit, just seeing them is really what it's about. 
Also - the world's biggest burger (a beef burger topped with a chicken breast topped with bacon and cheese and jalapeƱo chillies!!!!  
But it's OK, I didn't eat the bun :-) The chips however........ 
My train journeys were smooth and painless with no cancellations and I just had a lovely time...  

Tragically I now realise my holiday is as good as over.  Yes I have tomorrow, but it's just going to be an ordinary Sunday with work lunches to make and chores to sort out in preparation for a return to the real world. 
Waaaaaah don't wanna!!!! 

Thursday, 1 January 2015

2015 at last

I meant to post yesterday but accidentally fell headfirst into a bottle of Jamesons Irish Whiskey and by the time I made it out again I was in no shape to type.  In fact all I could do was collapse on the bed.  I may have been a little ill and it's possible I had a slight headache this morning although that, I'm sure, was down to the fireworks around midnight. I hope no-ones pets were too upset by all the noise, I was talking to a check out man at Morrisons this morning and he had to basically drug his dog to the edge of unconsciousness.
Anyhow, self-inflicted injury led to me staying in bed until almost 8am - 8am!!!! I kid you not, I absolutely do not remember the last time I got up that late. I spent the morning walking around wishing it was colder - it got very mild here, and damp, which was less refreshing than recent weather has been. Now I'm listening to a howling wind and I think I might have heard some thunder as well. Bring back my cold frosty mornings please, the lovely seasonal crunch and crackle of frosty grass underfoot, the dry sharp air... I miss it already, but still managed just under 6 miles walking.
Food today:
Breakfast: gf (homemade) toast with butter &  marmalade
Lunch: homemade soup
Dinner: Spanish chicken with rice & broccoli
Snacks: ummmmmmmmmmmmmm gf iced fruit cake slice and some pork scratchings.