Sunday, 5 January 2014

Accountability

The reason I said I was going to post my New Year weight on here is that I think it helps me to be accountable. If I hide something that I'm not proud of and avoid talking /writing about it I don't just see it as something private but as something shameful - for instance, when I first started binge eating I didn't tell anyone and tried to cover it up, spiralling into a cycle that was really hard to break out of - one which I only broke out of when I finally told M what was going on. I'm not saying gaining a bit of weight is something I feel that strongly about NOW, just that it's a pattern I've been in and don't want to revisit. Having said all that, I really don't want to type in this number and I came prepared with excuses (I'm constipated - true, I'm retaining water due to carbs - probably true, but I'm the one who ate them, etc etc)
but here it is: 164.5 lbs. My ideal weight, I've decided, would be 146 lbs so actually the right digits are there, but they're in the wrong order ;-)
So now I know what I have to do and how big the job is. You can't get where you need to go if you don't know where you're starting out!!!
Wish me luck....

1 comment:

  1. I wish you every success and hope you can approach this with relaxed attitude mistakes happen just pick yourself up and start again yesterday has gone and tomorrow may never come so just do the best you can each day. It is all any of us can do. And dont forget there is a billion pound industry out there trying to make you fat so they can sell you stuff to make you slim. They get rich and we get fat!!!!!

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