Friday, 16 August 2013

Grrrrrr

Yesterday I worked from home to wait in for a plumber due to a leak. In a house we're currently selling. As I wasn't using it M borrowed my car and left his to be collected by a local garage because its been doing some weird stuff. They forgot about us, collected it late, and couldn't / didn't get it back to us, which means, since I work closer to home, today I get to catch the train to work while he borrows it again. This will double the length of my (normally short) journey to work and require a change in Reading. I know this is no big deal, but I'm also hormonal right now (if you know what I mean) and as I've already complained at length, having knee problems.
Due to waiting in for plumbers, car collections, phone calls about cars, and car drop offs that didn't happen, I was less active than usual - in fact I didn't leave the house or train, and I'd planned to do both. Bet you can't guess what I did instead... Yep, I binged. Again. All of it except peanut butter and a protein cookie fitted within the letter of being paleo, demonstrating that you bloody can overeat on higher protein / fat diets if you really want to...
God, I wish is gone low carb about ten years ago before I started bingeing - if I had, I don't think I would ever have started. Now I'm starting to wonder if its something I discovered too late, and I'll always now react that way to stress / frustration / worry or loss of control. I'm not giving up on low carb because when I'm not bingeing I feel better for it and I think I binge less overall doing it. But so far anyway it hasn't really 'fixed' me... I'm still dysfunctional with food. I'd like to think I'll keep improving till one day I realise I haven't binged for a year / five years / a decade... Does anyone know if that's likely? Please tell me it is...

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