Tuesday, 19 April 2011

Confession time...

Last night turned into a slightly odd binge on meringue nests and freshly roasted chicken. I did not weigh today. I slept badly, got up early, and as (stupid and inefficient) penance, did 2 40 minute programs on the elliptical walker before breakfast. Then while getting dressed I caught sight of myself in the mirror and realised that even though I'm the heaviest I've been for about 3 years, I'm still nowhere near regaining all the weight I lost... and that could change if I keep up this self-pitying, guilty eating crap.

ENOUGH ALREADY.

Also, even if I stayed at this weight forever (which apparently I can do even while bingeing, eating chocolate etc.) I'd still be at a healthy weight (just) so why do I feel like such a failure? Because figuring this stuff out but not actually believing it is not motivation enough to kill the desire to comfort eat myself into oblivion, I guess...

I walked at lunchtime obviously, and it was a really beautiful day. It's a bit weird how long this early summer is lasting, but I'm not complaining!

Food today:

Breakfast: 2 scrambled eggs and low fat bacon

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Lunch: salad topped with roast chicken breast and low fat cheddar

Dinner: Chicken stir fry with courgette noodles

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Snacks: protein water, Greek yoghurt with blueberries, fruit

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