Tuesday, 16 October 2018

Monday and Tuesday

I didn’t post yesterday because I took a day off to spend in Cardiff with my brother, and we walked 12 miles and were both completely knackered by evening. It was a really good day, which was nice because it’s his birthday this week and that was one of his treats for the said birthday. We spent the morning in the town centre, then in the afternoon walked to the Bay area and wandered around at the water’s edge a bit. 

I had a good, well behaved lunch at Wetherspoons and then we each had a huge and unhealthy Five Guys milkshake (imagine getting a massive bowl of ice cream and allowing it to melt before drinking it through a straw and you’re in the right ball park)
It was a lovely day, much better than the average Monday at work (to say the very least) and it was almost physically painful going back to work today. Although not as painful as me feet were after the 12 miles yesterday.
Today was unbelievably tedious. I don’t like working in IT and I wish I could think of something else to do sometimes. Other times I just wish I could skip ahead to retirement with enough money for spontaneous days out at my leisure. Today is the second kind of day. I didn’t walk to the station and I’m OK with that given how sore my feet were yesterday.

Food today:
Breakfast: overnight oats with raspberries. I forgot the protein powder so added some Greek yogurt instead, which wasn’t as filling as usual.
Lunch: corn chowder. Should have been with a slice of GF bread, but I forgot the bread too. Are you sensing a theme? I wasn’t really sentient this morning while packing my bag for work.
Dinner: rump steak with cheesy spinach and mushrooms
Snacks: Smaller portion of Greek yogurt than planned; protein bar to make up for the lost protein powder; fruit

Thursday, 11 October 2018

.... And breathe...

The rage is subsiding today. Thanks goodness! I don’t like feeling that way, and I really don’t like worrying about whether I’m going to snap and someone and hurt their feelings (which could easily have happened yesterday) I pretty much started cooling down as soon as I left the office and felt pretty much OK by the time I got home. I guess it was a mood swing that was just too powerful for the patches?  If so I’m gladder than glad that my doctor prescribed them when she did, I could be locked up awaiting trial by now without them!
Storm Callum is forecast to hit us tomorrow bringing heavy rain and gale force winds in the early morning, easing off fairly early but staying at 20mph + for most of the day. Lovely Welsh weather…

Food today:
Breakfast: Overnight oats with raspberries
Lunch: Corn chowder
Dinner: Prawn fried (slim) rice
Snacks: Pea snacks; fruit

Wednesday, 10 October 2018


Today is World Mental health Day I hear, which is interesting because I’m feeling depressed and fed up and miserable and angry today. I don’t know why. I’m fully up to date with the meds and nothing has happened to put my back up, but I just can’t do Life today. Don’t want to be an adult. Don’t want to work. Don’t want… well, the list of things I don’t want to do is about ten miles long. I’ve spent most of the morning hiding in some noise cancelling headphones so I can’t hear anything going on in the office, trying to pretend I’m on my own and wishing I was working from home.
I didn’t sleep brilliantly last night, although not so badly it would explain my mood. My arm was a little sore where I got the vaccination yesterday, not enough to even feel apart from when I rolled onto my left side in the night and rested my weight on the arm, when it woke me up. My left side is my preferred side for sleep, of course… It was very annoying, especially as there’s nothing to see so I can’t get any sympathy for my tragic suffering…
No walk to the station this morning. I do still have a couple of miles a day from the Cardiff station to the office and back again, and I did do a little extra wandering around the town centre at lunchtime, mainly to shop but also to get away from all the office people. ALL the people. They’re everywhere.  And the office being approximately as hot as the surface of the sun today. And a fair amount of boredom. Most of it the same old same old, but with an added edge of intolerance today.

Food today:
Must not eat all the chocolate, must not eat all the chocolate, must not eat all the chocolate…
Breakfast: over-night oats with prunes – the constipation is still coming and going
Lunch – bratwurst with peppers and sauerkraut. Which I’m finally getting sick of. I’m sure you can’t believe it’s taken this long…
Dinner: belly pork (two strips) with sautéed boiled new potatoes and sauerkraut (not cooked like it is at lunchtime) and sweetcorn kernels
Snacks: fruit and Greek yogurt

Tuesday, 9 October 2018

So much better

Miraculously no ankle pain at all today. It’s weird because although I hoped it wouldn’t be as bad, I thought that something which hurt so much would take longer to wear off – I’m certainly not complaining though!
I walked to the station again today and this time left on time instead of leaving it to the last minute and then having to push myself. It certainly wasn’t as good exercise, but arriving at the office feeling slightly weepy and very self pitying yesterday was horrible so it’s a trade- off worth making. I had an appointment to get a flu jab in one of the other offices this morning, which is the other side of the town centre, so I was even happier that there was no ankle pain going on when I walked over there and back in addition to the station walking.
I also wasn’t zombieish from no sleep. All in all a much better way to start the day. It didn’t hurt that it’s a sunny day today – not too cold, and not too windy, and bright. My kind of day. I can’t believe it, but according the forecast tomorrow is due to hit 20 degrees in Cardiff. Weird, but nice if it’s true. Although the company that controls our climate control appears not to realise we’re having a late hot flush right now, and the office is baking hot as a result.

Food today: 
Breakfast: Overnight oats with mango
Lunch: bratwurst, sauerkraut and peppers
Dinner: Grilled (reduced fat) halloumi with salad
Snacks: greek yogurt, pea snacks and fruit with a couple of homemade pork rinds

Monday, 8 October 2018

I hate Mondays

specially Mondays where I wake up at 3:20 and give in and get up around 4 am. I. am. So. Tired.
The weekend wasn’t bad. It rained nearly all day Saturday so I was lazy and didn’t go for a walk. I can’t afford to get in the habit of not walking because of rain because the forecast shows it going on all weekend next weekend as well, and as previously mentioned, I’m not getting as much walking in in the week anymore. I didn’t eat too much though, so that was something.
Yesterday I did walk into town for some shopping and also had a productive day in terms of food prep, cooking, laundry and shopping. It wasn’t exciting but at least I didn’t vegetate indoors the whole day, and did get things done that needed doing. Because I worked from home on Thursday and Friday last week I’d had three consecutive days of no exercise at all, which may explain why I’m feeling stodgy and demotivated today. Yesterday I bought some zero alcohol sparkling wine just to try it - surprisingly not bad - and a miniature of whiskey – but didn’t drink it, and I deliberately bought the miniature in a ‘when it’s gone, it’s gone’ kind of way.
Today I walked to the station with torch in hand. I hate walking that route in the dark so I think I’ll be getting back to taking the taxi when I can’t use the car. Ironically I like that because it leaves me free to walk home when it isn’t dark instead of having to drive both ways, but until they come out with a car that can drive itself home that’s just the way it is. I did some walking at lunchtime in addition to the statin walk so despite being knackered right from the beginning of the day (and struggling to stay awake during a meeting this morning) I’ve actually been more active than usual. I really felt it though – my ankles were extremely painful this morning when I reached the office, and despite painkillers its come back several times since then. It wasn't as bad walking home, I think because I took my time rather than walking as fast as I could to catch the train.

Food today:
Breakfast: Overnight oats (with dried mango for a change)
Lunch: Bratwurst, sauerkraut and peppers
Dinner: Chicken fried rice made using ‘Slim rice’ instead of the real thing
Snacks: Greek yogurt with blueberries and cherries; pea snacks

Thursday, 4 October 2018


I wrote a post yesterday then overate and didn’t post because I was feeling down. I am no longer constipated thanks to dulcoease (I tried that out of the several kind suggestions because I’ve used it before with good results) and also made a large vat of corn chowder to keep things going as corn goes straight through me. Although that means I’m a lot more comfortable in terms of my digestive system I’ve been having a lot of back pain and that’s been wearing me down emotionally. In addition, after my email about changing my patch more frequently I not only didn’t, but I actually forgot to change it when it was due – remembering just before I left for work yesterday. All that combined yesterday to make me quite depressed and I had a few different off plan foods yesterday (still no booze – and nothing I would characterise as an actual binge though).
Today I’m working from home so the back feels better and I’m a bit less miserable but not quite back to usual. Come to think of it, miserable is usual for me a lot of the time so maybe that’s the problem? Anyway, here I am again, trying to get my act back together.
Food today:
Breakfast: oatmeal with cherries and protein powder
Lunch: Corn chowder with GF bread
Dinner: Chicken breast with broccoli and leek cheese
Snacks: Pea snacks and a protein bar 

Tuesday, 2 October 2018

Oh poop

Incredibly this morning I made it out of the house in one attempt! (I think – I might just not have realised what I’d forgotten yet). And I caught the correct train as well! It’s almost like I’m a competent adult rather than a child with the memory of a goldfish and the attention span of a butterfly!
I’m very constipated just now and interested in suggestions for getting things moving again. The stomach problems that kept me awake all night on Saturday were pains caused by a laxative pill so I’m looking for something less pharmaceutical if anyone can help. I’m seeing a demotivating small rise on the scales but I know it’s because I’ve been in this state since the laxative scoured my insides Saturday night. I eat lots of fibre and drink plenty of liquids; my body seems to react better to fat than fibre in this department but with the calorie counting I’m holding that in reserve for now. In the meantime I’m trying to remain strong while not seeing the results – and we all know how good at that I’m not.
As of this morning I’ve been booze-free for a full month and mostly stuck to the dieting for that long as well. Even with the current bump in weight I’m down 9 lbs from my highest point, but on Sunday morning that was more like 11 lbs and I’d like to see that happen properly again.
Still not training or walking, which may have something to do with my current problems. I know running is supposed to help with ‘movements’ so I assume walking can have some similar if gentler effect, but I can’t bring myself to walk in the dark and I’m pretty sure I’ll explode before the weekend if I don’t get through this. It’s actively uncomfortable at the moment as well.  Stupid body.
Anyway, enough of that.

Food today:
Breakfast: The usual overnight oats, with strawberries
Lunch: My last portion of the week of bratwurst with sauerkraut and peppers. I wonder why I’m so obsessed with that? Weirdo
Dinner: Very low fat sausages with lots of onions, oil spray fried new potatoes,. and a ‘broccoli slaw’ I made with grated broccoli root, spring onion, mixed peppers and salad dressing
Snacks: Greek yogurt with blueberries; pea snack; fruit